When He Asked Me to Stay for Her, I Chose Myself Chapter 09
After sending message after message, Ethan grew restless.
He grabbed his hair in frustration, then stared at the screen without blinking.
His eyes were wide and bloodshot from exhaustion.
He looked like he was about to crush the phone in his hand.
But Vivian’s phone was always on silent.
She also never checked her phone in the middle of the night.
So she didn’t see any of his messages.
Three in the morning.
Moonlight streamed through the window and fell across Ethan’s exhausted face.
He had finally calmed down from his earlier emotional breakdown.
Now, he slowly began reflecting on everything he had done.
Four years ago, on another night with a full moon, he had held flowers and confessed his feelings to Vivian.
“Vivian, I like you!”
“I want to be with you for the rest of my life!”
“No matter the storm or the rain, I’ll always hold an umbrella for you.”
“You’ll always be the only person by my side.”
—
But he hadn’t kept a single promise.
Instead, he had only grown closer and closer to Madison.
Until countless rumors started spreading about them.
He had even let Madison step under his umbrella right in front of Vivian.
He had laughed and run through the rain with Madison.
He had never once considered Vivian’s feelings.
He only cared about whether Madison was happy.
Ethan thought back to the day he had asked Vivian to end the pregnancy.
Back then, tears had covered Vivian’s face as she asked if they could keep the baby.
She had even wanted to marry him.
After all, they were already old enough to get married.
He had promised her,
“I’m sorry.”
“It was my fault.”
“I made you suffer.”
“There will never be a next time.”
“I won’t let you feel hurt again.”
—
“No matter what happens, I’ll always put your feelings first.”
“I’ll never let you go through that kind of pain again.”
But in the end…
He hadn’t kept a single promise.
Vivian had never been someone who spoke badly about others behind their backs.
They had been together for four years.
He knew exactly what kind of person Vivian was.
Yet he had easily believed Madison’s accusations against her.
Then by the same logic…
Why was Vivian wrong for doubting him and Madison?
Ethan bought a pack of cigarettes.
He sat on the side of the road and lit one.
Then he took a deep drag.
He used to be addicted to smoking.
Because of that, he coughed often.
It also affected his performance during experiments.
Professor Williams had warned him many times to quit.
Otherwise, he would miss out on many opportunities.
—
But he had never succeeded.
In the end, Vivian was the one who supervised him and helped him quit completely.
Only then was he able to participate in project after project.
Slowly, he built his reputation.
He once told Vivian,
“After we graduate, we’ll get married.”
“We’ll become better together and become better versions of ourselves.”
“We’ll step onto a bigger stage and see the world together.”
But now…
He had broken his promise.
And he still expected Vivian to stay and help the person who had replaced her in his life.
If their positions had been reversed…
If he were Vivian…
He knew he would have left too.
Maybe he would have left even more decisively.
So how could he possibly blame Vivian?
What right did he have?
—
Ethan suddenly felt that all the messages he had sent before were pathetic.
So he picked up his phone again.
[Vivian.]
[I’m sorry. I was too emotional earlier. Can we talk properly?]
[I’m begging you to believe me. Madison and I really have nothing between us.]
[I’ll prove it to you.]